We all have things that we don’t like about ourselves. Whether it be a big nose, sound of voice, height or small feet, it boils down to us comparing ourselves to others and what is considered ‘normal.’
As social creatures, we can’t help but do this because we innately fear that we will not be accepted in society.
See, for thousands of years, humanity depended on being a part of a group for survival. We developed the fear of not being accepted in the tribe because our lives literally depended on it. A tribe was connected by their similarities and generally, people who were different or not well aligned with the tribe were kicked out and left to wander alone. The fear of being alone is as prominent as the fear of not having enough food to survive.
There is another fear as well. The fear that we won’t be able to able to attract a suitable mate. We are biologically wired to reproduce and part of being able to is being considered attractive. The issue is that societies have certain standards for what is beautiful/attractive and when we don’t meet those standards, we feel insecure.
It is in our nature to want people to like us so we can’t help but care about how people perceive us. Don’t you remember how little you cared about how others perceived you as a child but as you grew older, you couldn’t help but care about what clothes you wore, how you looked and acted among others? You had to care because kids/teens would start judging you and treating you differently based on how well you fit society’s standards. Kids/teens generally don’t know who they are and would follow trends and mirror the cool kids or idols of society. We all wanted to fit in, even the more popular kids and bullies, and this just reflects on how inherently insecure we all are.
But society is different now and those fears built in to protect us are outdated. We don’t need other people’s approval to survive and the world is far more accepting of people’s differences than it was back then. There are 7 billion people and many of whom mirror your personality and will find you beautiful for who you are. Who you are.
That is where your true beauty exists but many of us fall into a trap that makes it impossible to experience who we truly are.
Too many of us believe that we will feel complete if we become someone that people like and admire. Some people want more money and success to impress others with their fancy cars, large houses and lavish lifestyle. Some want ‘beauty’ to be recognized and wanted by others. Some think that by fixing the way their nose looks, height or anything they believe to be a deficiency, that they would be “good enough” for others. But the problem is… they will never fix their insecurities because they will always be comparing themselves to others!
And when you compare yourself to others, you will always find something wrong with yourself because you are trying to keep up with other people’s standards. Would you really be satisfied with who you are if you had to constantly try to keep up? Probably not. Take a look at those celebrities who are constantly buying the latest cars and getting plastic surgery every few years yet are undergoing deep states of depression.
But there are some very happy celebrities out there and I’ll tell you what their secret is.
They don’t compare themselves to others and just love being who they are. Instead of wanting to be someone that people like, they just wanted to be themselves and as a result, spent years developing themselves by doing the things they genuinely wanted to do. These are people who know who they are and grow more each day. But I can’t say the same for most of the world’s population.
There are so many people who don’t even know who they truly are because they don’t like who they are and wish to be a “better” version of themselves that others would accept. When you are so caught up on who you want to be, you lose a sense of who you are right now and when you reject your “flaws,” you are rejecting a part of yourself and create a gap in your being that needs to be filled. And what is is filled by? Material things like plastic surgery, more clothing you don’t need or temporary highs. Its all temporary.
Heck… money, fame and beauty may make someone more accepted in the world but instead, makes them insecure about losing their acceptance. And so the chase continues on.
So what does this mean?
You cannot permanently fix your insecurities with material things because the essence of your problem is not outside of you… it is within you.
An insecurity is a repressed energy that grew the more you rejected a part of yourself. Even if you seemingly fixed your insecurity by making your nose smaller or increasing the size of your breasts, the energy would still exist in your body and move on to find more things that are wrong with you. The endless chase for acceptance from others ends when you realize…
The only person that you need acceptance from, IS YOURSELF! If you accepted yourself, you would already feel feel complete and start chasing after the things you actually want rather than what you think will make others like you. Instead of chasing after things like beauty to feel complete temporarily, you would want things you are truly passionate about and grow to be more wholesome in the process.
By freeing yourself of the standards and mental constructs of society, you become the true self beneath it all and act in accordance to your true nature. It is truly a shortcut…
If you want to be the person you are, you will be the person you want to be!
When you want the way your face looks, the way your body and personality is right now, you will be completely secure with who you are. You don’t need to make your nose smaller, become more masculine or have ‘perfect cheekbones’ for you to like yourself because you only wanted those things to look good according to other people’s standards. Standards of beauty and behavior are made up and change all the time.
The only standard you should have for yourself is to be yourself. The pure beauty and awesomeness of who you are lies in the essence of your being. In being your whole self, people will also begin to see the beauty and awesomeness of who you are.
Your energy and personality will be much more vibrant and you will find joy in being yourself. The way you feel about yourself reflects on your interactions with others and when you find joy in being yourself, others will find joy in your presence. In other words, you will find that people will like you more for being true to yourself and that you didn’t need to fix your insecurities to have a more fulfilling relationship with yourself and others.
So what would you rather do… chase after what other people might think is beautiful or stop chasing and find the beauty in what you already are? Of course you have flaws. We all have flaws. But it is when we accept our flaws as a part of us and make it a part of our personality, that we become whole.
Now don’t get me wrong..
I am not saying that you should never improve yourself. But the fact you want to improve or fix yourself implies there is something wrong with you. When you approach doing things like exercise, getting rid of acne in your face or speaking better English as expanding who you are, then you are not improving, you are growing.
For example, someone may be insecure about the way they speak English. They want to learn but feel ashamed of the way they speak English have a difficult time learning. The same goes for trying to change anything you don’t like about yourself. When you reject something about yourself, you lose the confidence and the willpower to make such changes.
But the person who loves and accepts himself and views learning English as a way of growing, will have an easier time learning how to speak English correctly. Being that he does not need others approval, he doesn’t feel shame or pressure and the process of learning is like playing a new video game for him. When you are at ease with yourself then you can ease your way into becoming and doing anything you want.
You would be more at ease when exercising or putting on acne cream because you already feel whole with yourself and aren’t depending on the results of your actions to feel whole. You grant your body and mind the space and energy it needs to create the changes you seek rather than overthinking things and needing results immediately.
The audio fields on SapienMed Youtube channel would also work faster for you so that you can more easily get lighter eyes or a flatter stomach. The sky is the limit. As long as you aren’t desperately trying to fix yourself and do these things as a way of expanding how complete you already feel. But when you do these things because you are trying to fix an insecurity, you are like a dog chasing its own tail.
We have released an audio frequency embedded with energy that will induce a state of self acceptance and unconditional love for yourself. In addition, the energy works on dissolving your insecurities over time.
I highly recommend those that suffer from insecurity issues to listen to this audio two to three times on a daily basis. Over time, you will obtain the level of confidence that you have always dreamed of having without changing anything about yourself.
The audio above will help tremendously in dissolving your insecurities and increasing your self esteem.
But it is crucial to gain a greater understanding of who you are in totality. We have been hearing the same script playing in our heads for so long, we begin to take the script as fact. “I am too fat,” “I am too shy to ever have a girlfriend,” “I have deepset eyes.” How many of these thoughts and beliefs do you have of yourself?
I would like for you to start making a list. Make a list of all of your insecurities as the week progresses. It doesn’t only have to be physical. It could be things that you do not like about yourself. Once you list them, ask yourself “why am I insecure about this?” When you answer that question, ask why to that answer. You keep asking why until you get to the source of your insecurity and what you will find is… that these insecurities are meaningless and only change that needs to be made is the way you think about yourself.
I don’t like the way my nose looks. Why?
It is too big.
Why does that matter?
It makes me look ugly.
Why does it make me ugly?
Attractive people don’t have big noses.
Most people don’t find big noses attractive.
Those are the standards…
I don’t know..
You see the point! At some point it gets ridiculous and you start to think… why am I even insecure about this… Try this exercise throughout the week and share what you find in the comments!